The Dilettwat

Category is: Runway Extravaganza!

There's been a lot of talk this season about which queens are bringing it on the runway. We hear it in Untucked and we read it online: Who's showing versatility, and who's not? Who's keeping their make-up fresh, and who's doing the same thing every week? Who's been judged too harshly by the judges, or not harshly enough? What do our Top Six queens look like, if we take all their runway looks together?

I wanted to find out, so please enjoy this compilation: every runway look from our Top Six thusfar. Put on "I Bring the Beat" and take a look back at the first eight episodes' worth of face, body, and look, darlings.

Click each queen to see them full-sized. Commence. Shake. DOWN.

Alaska

Alyssa Edwards

Coco Montrese

Detox

Jinkx Monsoon

Roxxxy Andrews

Now, the T is the T: I'm no fashion expert. So I want your opinions instead: who's been best-dressed so far? Who do you think has been holding back, and who's running out of tricks? Are there any trends that we should watch for in the coming weeks? Let me have it!

Coming up: I've been in YouTube upload hell for nearly 24 hours now. I prepared this post while waiting for YouTube to process my newest video, fer chrissakes. But trust: there is a video coming, and soon! And of course, the new episode of RuPaul's Drag Race is this Monday night, and you can expect your GIFgasm recap from me on Wednesday night.

Hit me up on Twitter (I am, of course, @Dilettwat), and stay tuned, darlings!

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 5 Episode 8: Scent of a Drag Queen recap

This episode put us through it, right? It's not comfortable, spending a full hour gagging like that.

We cold-open in the werkroom, just after Roxxxy and Alyssa's Hairwhip For Your Life. Roxxxy's hitting her post-cry endorphin rush, and has perked up since we last saw her. She apologizes for taking her anger and frustration out on Jinkx, and Jinkx accepts the apology. Meanwhile, Detox is frustrated that there are still seven queens in the competition. Alaska is playing "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" as Coco crows over her win.

She and Jinkx are quickly becoming a united front, but neither of them wants to fight with Coco on-camera more than necessary, so let's roll credits!

The queens come into the werkroom for the day's new challenge, hollering "Yes Gawd!" (These werkroom entrances make me nostalgic for DiDa Ritz. "Category is: Cheesecake!") The SheMail brings an onslaught of scent-related jokes, but before we start panty-sniffing, there's a meaty mini-challenge to behold.

The queens will play "Whatcha Packin'?" The answer, of course, is dick. Lots of generously-sized dicks and hefty balls, well-packed into Andrew Christian.

(And his underwear. *rimshot!*)

Last Night Broke My Entire Damned Heart

Here are my thousand words:

I had a big chunk of my heart set on Ivy Winters, and I wasn't the only one.

Actual recap forthcoming, of course. I'm definitely attending the Elimination Lunch today at noon EST, and you should come too. But for now: <3.

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 5 Episode 7: RuPaul Roast Recap

Smart girls and funny girls, pull out yer shades, because reading is fundamental.

We're back after Jade's elimination. Yay, Ivy won! While Jinkx had her fingers crossed for two challenge wins in a row, nobody begrudges Ivy her win. Alaska, meanwhile, is doing the math: she and Coco are the only two who haven't won challenges yet. She reminds the room that Sharon won four challenges (a record that won't be matched this season), and you can see that she's picked Chekov's gun off the make-up counter where she left it during last episode's cold open. (Throwback!)

Alaska deserves a heap of credit for playing a strategic game thusfar: she's done a brilliant job of avoiding runway comparisons to Sharon until now, when it backfired and the judges finally couldn't help letting their Sharon feelings bubble out. She's going to act on Michelle's advice, though, immediately and decisively: Rolaskatox is over. Roll credits!

Jinkx provides the human drumroll for her new bestie: "Alaska!" The Rolaskatox break-up talk seems quick, quiet, and diplomatic, though you can tell: Roxxxy is hurt, while Detox, mostly worried for Roxxxy, takes it for the strategic decision it is.

Hunker down: you'll be seeing a lot of Roxxxy's hurt-face this week.

SheMail! RuPaul is wearing his hair-flower from last episode's runway look, and whips out everybody's favorite mini-challenge accessory: reading glasses!

Unlike prior seasons, we're unfortunately not shown the whole down-the-line, but from what we see, the girls bring it. Watch the bonus clip for the rest of the reads: Roxxxy had at least three rhyming reads prepared, for chrissakes. Everybody has clearly done their reading homework. I'm suitably impressed by the entire group; at Season Five, there's no reason to flub this mini-challenge, and everybody landed a couple good reads. My two favorites:

Jinkx, to Roxxxy: "There are two types of peanut butter: creamy and crunchy."
Alaska, to Detox: "You're so seductive, but unfortunately, it's illegal to do it with you, because most of your parts are under eighteen years of age!"

Coco gets special credit for her 'read' of Detox, which Detox totally takes as a compliment: "Is Amanda Lepore your mother? Because there's a lot of silicone going on there." It's probably the nicest thing Coco has said to Detox this week.

Alaska's ribbing takes the win, and RuPaul explains the main challenge: a live comedy roast of RuPaul (and anybody else in the room). Alaska will decide the order of presentation, and their Swanky Cocktail Attire roast look will double as their runway look. This is clearly a challenge that calls for Day Drinking.

And when you hear the Absolut plug, you know Jeffrey Moran is on his way, and you'll need a fucking drink.

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 5 Episode 6: Can I Get an Amen? Recap (Part Two)

I realized the GIFs were choking themselves because there were so many this week, and they keep stalling out, so I'm breaking this post into two parts.

Read Part One here!

Part Two is under the jump...

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 5 Episode 6: Can I Get an Amen? Recap (Part One)

"AMEN!"

We open on the workroom after Lineysha's elimination, and her sweet message includes the new catchphrase for Puerto Rican queens in seasons to come: "Latino Shade!"

As she erases the mirror, Detox resolves to step her game up and never be in the bottom two again. Meanwhile, Jade and Ivy congratulate Jinkx on her Little Edie win, but before Jinkx has the chance to bask in her victory, we smash-cut to Miss Thang throwing a Tamar party.

(It's at this point, writing this recap, that I realize: for as much grief as the queens who didn't know Grey Gardens got on Facebook and Twitter last week (and boy howdy, did the internet let Coco and Roxxxy have it, to the point that Jinkx had to call off the dogs), it's borderline-irresponsible that I still don't have any idea what Tamar Braxton is like. So I watched this YouTube clip, and I gotta say: Roxxxy fucking nailed it last week. Tamar literally says shit like "That tasted like ass-crack dot com!" and "I am so over this, dot org." Tamar Braxton might not be my spirit animal, but she is the perfect spirit animal for Miss Thang. But I digress.)

Alaska sets down Chekhov's gun on the make-up counter, declaring, "Rolaskatox is firmly intact and ready for the kill!" Jinkx confessionalizes her frustration at not being considered a frontrunner by the other queens, and the editors mix in some over-dramatic music and snoring to really drive home the "Take this one seriously!" message. Roll credits! Prizes! Extra special guest judges!

My new goal: rocking glittery silver leggings in my mid-sixties. This photo is the living definition of "She's still got it!"

Good morning, werkroom! "Rolaskatox!" "Jinkx!" "Jade!" Now that we're past the Snatch Game, the girls feel the second act of their season heat up. Alyssa observes, "It's balls to the walls. Literally." Ooh, are we getting a reprise of that Season Three nude-in-a-corner black-and-white photoshoot mini-challenge?

Nope. We're getting something even better: Drag in the Dark! We watch the girls beat their faces through my new favorite Instagram filter, RuPerv.

Does this moment fulfill a contractual advertising agreement between World of Wonder and Andrew Christian?

I am in love with "Drag In the Dark." I wish we could've seen more than a few moments of its execution, and I hope it becomes an annual mini-challenge! Too soon, though, the challenge is complete. Jinkx throws in a Death Becomes Her reference, the editors know a moment of GIF-bait when they see it, and I'm happy to oblige both of them.

To my dilettante eyes, most of the girls look pretty okay! By far my favorite is Alaska's, who has missed her entire mouth by a couple inches. Hers was absolutely the perfect response to this challenge.

However, RuPaul declares Detox the winner, and announces that as her prize, Detox will assign groups for the main challenge: an inspirational supergroup anthem called "Can I Get an Amen?" Of course, Rolaskatox will work together, and Detox then assigns Jade, Jinkx, and Ivy to a team, leaving Coco and Alyssa as a duo.

Alyssa just laughs it off, but Coco wastes no time in calling Detox a "shady bitch" in front of Ru and everybody. (That challenge where Coco was captain, didn't she pick Alyssa first? And didn't their collaborative dance go really, really well? I think I remember the answer being yes. Anyway, have the commentary GIF and let's move on.)

Alyssa's in a great mood today, and she's making an honest effort to engage Coco and have fun with the challenge. I'd been hot-and-cold on Alyssa for most of the season, mostly because it took me a few episodes to realize that what I'd been misinterpreting as aggression and rudeness was really just her non-stop frankness and a slightly-broken social filter, but her intent is almost never malicious. I really respect the way she handled this challenge, and I'm definitely counting myself as a permanent Alyssa fan these days. I mean really: how can you not love this girl?

(Clock Coco's "Halleloo!" slap-bracelet, by the way.)

Meanwhile, it's Jade's poor luck that she's been paired with two of the best voices in the room. While Jinkx and Ivy harmonize with breezy perfection, Jade feels sidelined, and there's a not-entirely-sweet "Ma, we're trying to include our annoying little sister, but it's not working" vibe in this group. (nb: they're all basically the same age, actually.) Ru floats over and says, "It's like Wilson Phillips is back together!" 

I wanted to find a side-by-side where Jinkx, Ivy, and Jade looked like Wilson Phillips. I got distracted.

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 5: Mid-Season Analysis

We started this year with fourteen queens, and now we're down to seven. As I tipsily tweeted last night: this is the beginning of the rest of your season.

Since we're at the halfway point, I wanted to look back at past seasons' records and see what, if anything, we can infer from them, and what they might tell us about what's to come this season. (Translation: shit's about to get real data-crunchy, then turn maudlin at the end. It's how I roll.)

This is a spoiler-free post, save the results of this season thusfar (including last night's elimination). Just analysis and speculation here!

To start, let's look at the records for Seasons 2 - 5. (I love and respect Season 1, but it's not very useful for comparison: it featured a third fewer queens and episodes, and it hadn't yet adopted the season-spanning ordering and rhythm of challenges we expect to see now. It featured a total of seven competition episodes, and on Season Five, our seventh competition episode is next week.)

These are all sourced from the Wikipedia pages for the individual seasons. You can click the images to see them at full size.

Season Two:

Season Three:

Season Four:

Season Five:

First, what can we say about the past seasons' winners?

1. The queen who wins the most challenges wins the season.

This isn't a hard-and-fast rule: ultimately, RuPaul is going to choose who RuPaul chooses. It holds, though: yes, Raja and Manila tied for number of challenges won, but BeBe, Tyra, and Sharon all won the most challenges in their seasons.

This season, nobody has yet won two challenges, making it anybody's game. That also makes this season unique: it's never taken this long for a queen to win two challenges. Sharon and Alexis did it by the third competition episode, and Tyra did it by Episode 5. Of the remaining queens, only Coco and Alaska haven't yet won a challenge; everybody else has one win.

2. No team captain has ever won her season.

Here's a nugget of trivia: BeBe, Tyra, Raja, and Sharon were never team captains. While being a team captain isn't directly damning to your chances of winning, RuPaul's Drag Race has a terrifying sashay rate for its captains.

Here's the mathetmatical T: in Seasons 1 - 4, the overall random-statistical chance of any one queen being in the bottom two during any given team challenge was 19%, and the statistical chance of any one queen being eliminated was 9.5%. However, if you look at the numbers for captains, the statistical likelihood of a captain being in the bottom two of a team challenge rises from 19% to 26.3%, and the likelihood of a captain sashaying rises from 9.5% to 15.8%. (If anybody's interested in how I arrived at those numbers, let me know in the comments and I'll reply with my methodology. You can trust me on this, though.)

Or, to look at it another way, and include this season: Through Seasons 1 - 5, there have been a total of twelve team challenges. In four of them, a captain sashayed. One third of all team challenges have resulted in a captain's elimination.

Like I said: being a captain doesn't inherently hurt your chances of winning, but captaining a team isn't statistically favorable to your chances of surviving the challenge, either. Now that we're past the Snatch Game, team challenges have concluded. Of the remaining Season Five queens, only Roxxxy never served as a captain.

3. The last two seasons, the winner of the first challenge won the season.

This is more coincidence than indicator, but it's true: Raja and Sharon were both swinging hard out of the gate, and while Morgan won the first challenge of Season 2, Tyra was a high-scorer too.

(Editor's note-to-self: "Swinging hard out of the gate?" Oh so now we're mixing baseball metaphors and race-horse metaphors in the same phrase? I guess this is why I cover drag, not sports.)

Of course, we know that Roxxxy won the first challenge of Season Five.

Now that we've looked specifically at commonalities among the winners, what else can we glean from past seasons' records?

4. Unless you're gunning for Top Three, nobody survives their third Lip Synch.

Nobody. While many excellent queens have survived two LSFYLs (Raven, Sahara, Shangela, Delta, Jiggly, Milan), each of those queens was eliminated on her third lip synch. The only two queens to survive their third lip synchs were Jujubee and Alexis, both while moving from Top Four to Top Three.

Of the remaining Season Five queens, only Coco has already survived two lip synchs, putting her in this danger zone. Detox has survived one, and none of the other queens have lip synched yet.

5. The returning Top Five queen probably hasn't been eliminated yet.

This is more of a hunch than anything else. It's hard to compare Carmen's and Kenya's records and find predictive trends: neither of them ever won a challenge, and both of them were initially eliminated before their third lip synch, but that's true of many queens who weren't called back. Carmen bypassed one episode; Kenya bypassed four. It's a tough call.

The "second Top Five" episode, which is the "put a random dude in drag" challenge, will be Episode 10 this year. Jade's elimination was Episode 6. Right now, looking at the win/high/in/low records of the remaining Season Five queens, the clear statistical frontrunners are Jinkx, Ivy, and Roxxxy, with an uncomfortable number of safe/low rankings from the rest of the pack. If any of these three are eliminated in the next couple episodes, I'd bet my hat they come back on April 8. If it's not one of those three, though, your guess is as good as mine--maybe Jade? Maybe Lineysha?

6. So, who's winning Season Five?

I'm laying down my prediction now: from the win/high/safe/low records, from the edits they're getting, and from my gut, I think we're looking at a Top Two showdown between Jinkx and Roxxxy. Among the others--Alyssa, Alaska, Coco, Detox, and Ivy--I don't have a good guess for Top Three, or even Top Four. The upcoming challenges will find unexpected ways to stymie the queens, and in particular, the Top Four Ball Challenge has always pushed the queens' mettle to the breaking point.

(If I was going to hand-pick my favorites for the top three at this moment, mine would be Jinkx, Ivy, and Alaska. That said, I don't think my personal preference has much influence over RuPaul's decisions, let alone the results of challenges filmed more than half a year ago.)

Unless she makes a unexpected turn to jackassery in the next few episodes, I think Jinkx will win Miss Congeniality. Her fan support online is massive, and she's getting an extremely sympathetic edit. This assumes, naturally, that the other queens' behavior and stories hold their course--it's entirely possible (and even likely) that another queen will have an episode that results in a surge of love from the fanbase.

So here we go again: RuPaul's Drag Race season five, Chapter Two. The next couple months are the main event.

The second half of this season is when we'll get to deeply know and love the final competitors. We're going to watch these seven queens develop lifetime friendships with each other, as well as fanbases that will follow them through their entire careers. As RuPaul herself said: I can't wait to see how this turns out.

I want to hear what you think! Leave a comment below and let me know your predictions, and follow me on Twitter and we'll talk about what's coming up. (The only request I have: I'm trying hard to avoid actual spoilers, the kind that come from queens' drag moms and loose-lipped cameramen. If you actually know what's going to happen, please don't tell me.) *thumbs up!*

Coming tomorrow: a deliciously GIFfy recap of "Can I Get an Amen?" Plus, I have prizes to give away to readers! Stay tuned, darlings.

SPOILERS: Top Five, In Front of Our Nose the Whole Time

I can't believe I missed this: there were Top Five spoilers built into the first moments of RuPaullywood or Bust! Plus, screenshots leading to speculation on a future runway challenge, because girl, your wigs don't match.

Explanation after the jump!